personal development

Recover that childlike positive attitude

A lot of what I write is about concerns a positive mind and an attitude to do your best. But how often do we feel negative about a situation, a person, or life in general?

The answer is…Too much.

Kids don’t spend so much time on negative thoughts (even if it something feels like it!).

Children do these two things:

  1. When upset, a child can be uncontrollable. But it doesn’t take long before they usually calm down and forget all about the problem.
  2. When a child finds something interesting, they focus their entire attention on that one thing for a long, long time.

Adults do these two things:

  1. When upset, they focus their entire attention on that one thing for a long, long time.
  2. When an adult finds something interesting, they’re briefly happy. But usually, after very little time has passed, an adult will find twenty other things that need attending to and lose track of any initial interest.

For most uni goers, there’s a bit of the kid in us (woo!), but we’re adults too. It makes life pretty confusing at times.

No wonder we have our fair share of ups and downs.

So how do you achieve a positive attitude from a negative one? Here are some ideas:

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Your Perfectionism is Just Fancy Procrastination

Due to the nature of this blog, I tend to read many self-help books, study guides, productivity blogs, and so on.  While I may not agree with everything out there, I regularly find writing that I totally agree with; the advice is sound.

But I’m reading up for research purposes and to find quality links and pearls of wisdom that I hadn’t thought about myself.  Your reasons for reading study tips and advice should be rather different to this.

Are you happy with your overall techniques?  Do you mainly read advice and find yourself in agreement with it, or does it help you contemplate change?  Do you spend too much time reading up on self-help, rather than helping yourself?

I recently had a discussion with a friend about the meaning of ‘doing the right thing’.  While it was based on personal choices, rather than working techniques, the conclusion can work on either level.  We concluded that our personal positions are often based on our individual perceptions of what is right and wrong.  But in the general, overall sense, nothing is as certain as ‘right’ or ‘wrong’.  Because this leaves room for doubt in our minds, we end up fuelling a relentless pursuit of perfection.

photo by yosmer

Doughnuts…so right or so wrong?

So today, I want to give you one piece of advice:

  • When you’re relatively in touch with your academic work and have a keen grasp on what matters and what suits you…STOP looking for more advice and START working.

You may read a lot of tips that tell you to “Just do it”, because starting is often the best way to find a voice and explore what’s on your mind.  But this isn’t the same thing.

The difference is that you have been looking to further yourself and, in turn, have positively developed.  The likelihood is that you already have started “just doing it”, but you can probably do it a lot faster now if you focused on that task alone.

With a quality set of techniques in the bag, now is the time to crack on.  If you insist upon perfection, you will end up wasting more time that the period before you had a focused set of study techniques.

Some near perfect outcomes can only occur through imperfection.  The reason being: there is no such thing as perfect.

The story of a professor who has just solved a 140-year-old mathematical puzzle has nothing to do with a ‘perfect’ working environment.  He was simply sitting in a lecture, letting his mind wander as he grew bored.  You can’t ask for something quite so perfect through such unlikely circumstances.

You have it in you to create your own eureka moments.  So if you’re pretty happy with the way you get on with your academic work, let the creative and practical juices flow and let it take you through glorious (im)perfection.

10 tips to pick yourself up after a fall

When it all goes wrong, how do you recover?

photo by wordjammer

Quickly, I hope.

Failure and unexpected setback can eat away at you if you think about it too much. The more you let it take over, the less capable you will become in future assignments and activities.

This type of suffering is, of course, a double blow. It can have such a speedy snowball effect that you may not understand what originally caused such a problem so suddenly.

I hope these following tips serve as a help for any future falls. But if you’re experiencing the upset of a fall right now, don’t be alarmed; let these short tips bring you right back to recovery. Long may you be fighting fit and ready for anything!

10 tips to pick yourself up after a fall

  1. Don’t relive the memories – Firstly, you can’t change the past. Secondly, playing something over and over again in your mind doesn’t help. Thirdly, understand what went wrong so you can be ready for a similar problem next time, but do this through active consideration rather than replaying the moment disaster struck. (more…)

10 + 2 Keys to Success

 The Key To Your Success (photo by Clearly Ambiguous)

It’s just like in business.  By following certain keys to success, you can greatly improve your lot.  Working toward a degree needn’t be a slog and it should be fun.

While reading various tips to success from top businessmen, it becomes apparent that they are good tips for life in general.  So you can use this same advice toward succeeding in your degree and beyond.  Here are 10 keys to success that are consistently mentioned by those at the top:

photo by danzo08

1. Put the work in/Work hard – This is pretty obvious, but we all need reminding from time to time.  You won’t get anywhere if you sit around and wait for everything to magically finish by itself.

2. Do your best, then aim for better – Doing your best is great, but that doesn’t mean there’s no scope for improvement.  When you know what your best looks like, consider what you can improve.  Target areas that were (constructively) criticised by tutors, marked lower than you would have liked, or structured in a way that no longer look as good in your mind.

3. Keep at it (practice makes better…and better…not perfect) – Tiger Woods doesn’t stop practicing his golf.  He may be bloody good, but there’s no such thing as perfect.  One of the secrets of many successful people is not that they were true overnight successes…they actually put in many years of practice before establishing themselves in the public eye.  So the more you work on something, the better you can master the necessary skills.

4. Don’t be complacent – It’s a big mistake to ‘get by’.  Just doing enough might feel like a good balance, but it’s not enough.  I have first-hand experience of this and it was my biggest issue when at school (all those many years ago! 😉 ).  I don’t regret what happened, because I learned not to be complacent again.  Sometimes we just have to learn the hard way before it sinks in!

5. Have the courage to change – There are several human blocks that hurt more than help, yet they are regularly used to make life feel easier.  Crazy.  One of those blocks is the resistance to change.  Routines and comfort zones feel so safe, but they end up getting us nowhere.  Plus, we look around and see more successful people and grumble about that too.  One of the reasons for the success is no doubt down to embracing change.  If something isn’t working, do something else.  When a process can be improved, make the alterations with pride.  How do you get whatever you want?  You adapt until you find a way to get it.

6. Let go of fear – Another blocker.  When you fear, you don’t give it your all.  When you fear, ambition fades away.  When you fear, success is trampled over by negative thought.  You don’t need to be cocky to be ambitious and you don’t need to be arrogant to reach your goals…A lack of fear is the beginning of confidence.

7. Failure doesn’t mean losing – If at first you don’t succeed, try TRY again.  We learn from our mistakes, which are plentiful.  You’re not alone in getting things wrong.  You’re not an idiot.  The most successful of people often fail just as much (or perhaps more) than they succeed.  But they learn lessons, they pick themselves up, and they move on.  Whatever does turn out a success more than makes up for the past failures.

8. Stress out and relax…in equal doses – Full-on stress is clearly a bad thing, but it’s just as bad to chill out non-stop.  To make the most of a project, you must push yourself beyond what you already know.  Learning isn’t always cosy, but that shouldn’t make it less fun.  With some intense focus, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t surprise yourself.  And once that push results in achievement, it’s time to sit back, relax, and enjoy a well-earned break.

9. Be open, be warm, be friendly – Whatever your mode of study, there’s more to be had from it when you consider others and treat them as you would want to be treated yourself.  Even if you’re usually a lone worker, there are still occasions where you need to ask questions or you have to interact with staff.  The more you can engage with them on a friendly level, the more you should get out of them.  A big part of success is getting people on your side.

10. Take some risks – It feels good to play it safe, but it’s pretty exhilarating to take a risk.  Well, that’s as long as you’ve considered the risk and you don’t just blindly go forth into dark and scary lands.  If you’re just reaching out to danger for the thrill and danger, you’re on your own mate!  But sometimes the risk is about either improving your lot a great deal or taking a minor setback that can easily be recovered from.  If the potential advantages outweigh the disadvantages (and it’s not completely outlandish, natch), it might be time to take that risk with a smile and a skip in your step.

photo by danzo08

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There are 2 other keys that don’t particularly rely upon your input, but are worth thinking about:

  1. Sometimes you just get lucky – Success can occur when you least expect it.  Sometimes a half-hearted effort turns out to be pure genius and you’re hailed a hero.  While congratulations are in order, don’t expect this to be the case and don’t bother too hard trying to work out how to emulate this fluke success.  If we could all do that, we’d all know the answer by now.  Although you could try to make your own luck…
  2. Sometimes other people just get lucky – All that hard work you put in to something may end up getting you nowhere special.  Then someone else comes along and strikes it lucky without even trying.  Again, you won’t be able to emulate that success.  And it’s certainly not worth dwelling upon.  You’ll get your fair share of success if you follow the 10 keys set out above…