All Students

The Real Reason Why ‘Be Yourself’ Gets a Bum Deal

There are many times when you hear the advice ‘just be yourself’:

  • Meeting new people;
  • In unknown social situations;
  • At an interview;
  • When giving a talk or presentation;
  • Trying to achieve almost anything;
  • Making an application

‘Yourself’ seems pretty quipped to win all the prizes.

So what’s going on? Why are so many of us not being ourselves? It seems like a pretty easy thing to aspire to.

Two little words. Ten letters in total. It doesn’t amount to much and it promises the world.

— BE YOURSELF —

Herein lies the problem. The advice is vague. It doesn’t mean enough in isolation.

Yet ‘Be Yourself’ is often touted as a solution. It is not.

Just stay the way you are and be true to that… Nothing is solved by that. Being yourself is not a talent.

You are not fixed in place. Seek to better your skills and experiences. Find out more. Try harder and keep trying. Hardly same old, same old.

To be yourself is to owe yourself better each day. When you fall, you pick yourself up. You accept and you either move on or you try again. What you don’t do is give up or do something you don’t believe in. Challenge yourself and do new things, but do it with purpose and with your own interests at heart. Do what you need to do, not what you think people would like or expect you to do.

change (photo by Send me adrift)

You are not unchanging. Yourself is a term that exists in many different states. (photo by Send me adrift)

There’s little point in trying to emulate someone else either. Susan Cain makes the point nicely in her book, Quiet:

“Bill Gates is never going to be Bill Clinton, no matter how he polishes his social skills, and Bill Clinton can never be Bill Gates, no matter how much time he spends alone with a computer.”

However, there are many things you can improve without changing how you are as a person. At the beginning of his career, Mars Dorian was told that a lack of empathy was part of his personality and he should find something that didn’t involve customer communication.

Rejecting the idea that Dorian had a flaw that could not be rectified, he looked to learn and improve his understanding and skills in that area. In his words, “I worked hard to become my best self”.

There we are again. The ‘best self’ is not sticking to your guns and shirking improvement. Neither is it a refusal to learn new things. Being your best self is about discovery, renewal, and at times surprising everyone, including yourself.

The more you strive to be your best self, the more you should embrace change as a necessary part of finding what works for you.

Think about very young children. When a parent delights at how their son or daughter thrives on just being their own person, they acknowledge a child that is learning all the time and adapting to their circumstances.

Let’s recap. To be yourself is to find what works for you at any given time. To be yourself is to question your actions. To be yourself is to embrace change in yourself and have the confidence to accept you’re not perfect and that you’re always learning.

How often are you told to be yourself on those terms? No wonder it gets a bum deal.

Keep Your Desk Tidy (No Matter How You Use It)

What is your main working space like?

When you sit down to study, what do you encounter?

A haven of minimal zen mastery? A sea of junk that’s pretty stormy at its best? A makeshift area of whatever space is currently available?

Because where you work matters. Presentation shouldn’t be left to your work. You need to get serious about your surroundings too!

A typical student's desk. Okay, okay, perhaps the mechanical stamp is a step too far...

A typical student’s desk. Okay, okay, perhaps the mechanical stamp is a step too far…

Some desks are (supposed to be) for nothing more than study. In reality, that leaves a lot of space begging to be used.

Other desks have multiple purposes. Work, entertainment, storage, you name it.

However you use your desk, let’s take a look at how to keep the space tidy.

For a dedicated work space:

Use your desk as a desk – A smooth surface is such an easy dumping target. It’s easy to succomb to temptation. Make sure you have a system in place and remove things you don’t physically need there.

Accessibility is key – Keep the important items nearby and find appropriate housing for everything. Boxes, holders and folders give active spaces for everything and keeps you focused on your work, rather than where your stuff is hiding. A focused mind is crucial, since it can take around 23 minutes to recover from interruptions. Ouch.

Love your space – You need a welcoming area to inspire you. But there’s a fine line between too sparse and too distracting. Have just enough to inspire and cheer you.

Have a 2-minute clean-up process – You know how quickly things can get messy. Clear up each evening so you’re ready for the following day. If you don’t create too much clutter, you could do a 10-minute clear once a fortnight instead. Think ‘little and often’. A short and simple system is easy to keep on top of when you get used to it. Make a habit of removing the rubbish straight away.

—

Not everyone has the luxury of a work station. When you use your desk for several purposes, remember these things:

Prepare your space – The stuff around you competes for attention and importance. Make sure you have enough space to do work. Arrange the space in advance as far as you can. A makeshift space at the last minute doesn’t help productivity at all.

Stick to priorities – With junk all over the place, you’re easily distracted. You can also spend too much time looking for necessary books and equipment when they aren’t laid out in a suitable place. Consider the priorities you need, not the priorities you want. When coursework and reading is important, ensure your desk is primed for that priority. Everything else takes second place. If other uses take over, it’s time to take action.

With no dedicated study space, a basic order is a must – I used to put everything in random piles so I could hide them out of sight very quickly. I soon realised that it’s far better to give everything a suitable home. It was easier for me and it looked even more presentable than keeping everything hidden.

—

You live and learn! And now you’ve read this, you can start as you mean to go on. You tidy, wonderful person, you!

Why Pointless Learning Still Has a Point

What’s the point in learning anything with no future purpose? Take juggling. Isn’t it just a waste of time when you could be learning something more relevant to your future?

Not always.

photo by Stéfan (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

photo by Stéfan (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

Lifehacker talks of a University of Oxford study from 2009 that discovered changes in the brain when learning new and complex tasks. In the case of the study, juggling.

This is positive. But hold your horses. It’s hard to come to any bold conclusion straight away:

“MRI is an indirect way to measure brain structure and so we cannot be sure exactly what is changing when these people learn.”

Nevertheless, this may be a sign of how important it is to stretch yourself. You may not want to always look for the easy option.

When you feel like you’re on a roll and you’re getting through everything easily, it feels good to work in that state of flow. We tend to enjoy flow as a productive state and gravitate toward it as much as possible.

But Cal Newport explains that flow is not as useful as the state of strain. When you’re in the flow, there’s nowhere to go. Not much challenges you.

The challenge comes when you introduce something new, difficult, and potentially risky. If you’re not used to juggling, it’s difficult, and you risk dropping a lot of stuff that you’re not meant to drop. Just to clarify, juggling involves keeping stuff up in the air…

The activity of juggling itself may provide few direct benefits for you, yet the magic comes through the indirect qualities of such ‘strain’ on the brain.

I spend more time when learning new things than when dealing with tasks and content I already have awareness of. Although it’s easier to find the state of flow because I’m enjoying and recognising what I’m doing, it isn’t challenging me in a total sense.

I have never learned to juggle. But if I ever wish to, I should jump on it.

Same goes for you. The combination of desire to learn mixed with rising to the challenge is strong. No wonder Josh Kaufman says it only takes around 20 hours to get pretty competent in something new. Forget 10,000 hours to become world class, spend less than one day total becoming good enough. It’s surprising how much you can learn this way.

Strain sounds uncomfortable. It certainly doesn’t sound preferable to flow. But under the right circumstances it’ll bring you far more satisfaction and open your mind to far more than you could imagine. Over the past year or so, I’ve spent relatively little time learning a lot about nutrition, baking, ukulele and guitar, early years learning, and the beginnings of humankind. I’ve also picked up some basics regarding steam engines, the solar system, and physics. Much of it has come about outside of anything I deliberately wanted to learn. Yet I still discovered a lot.

The strain I felt fuelled my enthusiasm further. None of it was easy, but it was multiple times easier than I would ever have imagined. A spark is all it takes. A bit of strain is just as necessary as the state of flow.

New and complex tasks sound scary and time-consuming at first. But it seems that’s the point!

Next time you’re interested in something with no apparent future purpose, it may be one of the most important things you learn.

What are you going to challenge yourself to today?

9 Tips to Prepare for Jobs and Careers Long Before You Graduate

It’s never too early to think about what you’re going to do when you graduate.

Everything is a preparation. You’re not meant to wait until you finish your degree before preparing for the future. Make your time count.

You may not even be at uni yet. No matter. The longer you give yourself, the more chance you have to jump in and get comfortable.

Cat Ready (photo by kissro)

It’s all about preparation. Get ready to pounce… (photo by kissro) CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

Here are 9 things you can do early on in anticipation of what’s ahead of you when you leave university. Why wait?

1. Get involved in relevant professional associations and groups

This is easier than ever. With an Internet connection and a bit of time to search, almost everything is at your fingertips. This is a recent development and worth pursuing.

For the most important associations, do consider paying for student or basic membership. It’s worth the cost if you get some kind of recognition and if membership gives you various other benefits that you can tap into. Do your research and see what’s on offer. You may be pleasantly surprised.

2. Join LinkedIn groups, subscribe to blogs, and follow Twitter users in your field

Another recent development and easy to implement. Spend just a few minutes each week following a few key accounts and you’ll build up a great source of content in no time at all. You can then reach out, comment, and even offer advice as you go along.

As a recent Jisc article mentions, “The recruiters are there. The employers are there. So why aren’t the students?” There’s a lot going on!

3. Write, record, and video stuff

Most of us consume content, but how often do you produce it? You can make an impression even if you make something about your search from nothing. You can still impress when you publish basic information for absolute beginners. You’re making the effort and making it public. That speaks volumes.

People will value your content. We all have to begin from somewhere, so don’t worry that you’re being too simple. Your information may be exactly what someone else is looking for.

4. Show up where you’d like to show up

The more you get involved, the more you will be seen. And as your exposure increases, you’ll be offered other opportunities to increase your exposure yet more. It’s like a snowball effect.

Seek out free events, find cheap student tickets (or free press tickets if you are writing prolifically enough now!), and find what your university and local area have on offer as far ahead as possible.

5. Tap into alumni

Speak to your alumni office to find out what they have to offer. Some universities provide a lot of help and contact after you graduate, including professional development and networking opportunities.

6. Your careers service is your friend

Many students are using careers services earlier on in their degree. Gone are the days where you don’t bother thinking about it until just before final exams. Whether or not you know what jobs and careers you’re interested in, you’ll find a wealth of information and advice on offer to you. Use it!

7. Speak with your tutors (if applicable)

This works best when you want to remain involved in a field directly related to your degree subject or if they can impart specialist information. If so, your lecturers and other uni staff are a great potential source of leads and contacts. They’re a great place source for quality leads that they themselves endorse and rely upon. For that reason, plan ahead with questions and requests that aren’t easily available elsewhere. Make the contact count.

8. Keep an ear to the ground

Read the latest news in your line of work and look out for where people get their trade information from. Over time, you’ll build up loads of valuable resources that require very little effort keeping on top of. Imagine having to start from scratch only after you’ve graduated. Save yourself time and give yourself the upper hand with everything at your fingertips as early as possible.

9. Find direct links to businesses you’re interested in

By building up connections not just with people, but with companies, there is a much greater chance that you’ll be known as a matter of course. Picture making a name for yourself while you’re still at university. Forget waiting, interact with companies and individuals you love right now.

Find ways to offer value and impart your knowledge to those who would appreciate it. A small gesture that takes five minutes of your time may prove more useful than desperately seeking an internship post. You can’t compare them like for like, but the small gesture is something you can do right now. Make contact and provide value when you see the opportunity.

—

A few minutes out of every day is all it takes to make a huge difference. Schedule it into your day. Commit to quarter of an hour to do one small thing, write a short piece, or make contact with someone. Whatever you do, don’t expect a miracle in isolation. Keep preparing so you don’t have to play catch-up later.

A few minutes. No big deal. Preparation is best when it’s spaced out, regular, calm. Make a start today.