Revisiting some clichés that revolve around uni students

Does living the academic life really change THAT much?

You may have heard these clichés before. You may have tried to argue with others who have claimed these clichés are true. You may have even believed some of the clichés yourself. But how true are they really? Well, here are my thoughts on the matter:

“Alcohol is their world.”

Drinks Cabinet

The consumption of copious amounts of alcohol is obviously going to be high up on many a student’s list. This isn’t going to go away. Do you honestly think that many 18 and 19 year olds would want to miss out on cheap drink down the Student Union?

Nevertheless, only the most die hard of drinkers will claim alcohol to be the single wonder of the academic world. For most others, it’s part and parcel of uni life, just like lectures and studying are. They might not always be the best thing, but you know it’s usually worth it in the long run.

I’m not your Dad, fair enough…But remember to stick to your limit and don’t go crazy. So what if one of your mates can drink for Britain? So what if he chooses whisky for his mouthwash of choice? It doesn’t mean you need to follow that path. If you’ve had a bit too much to drink, stop before it gets worse. Don’t fall for the peer pressure. If you’re going to look a dick either way, you might as well make it a more sober dick. You’ve got more chance of redeeming the night that way…trust me. I’ve only ever managed to redeem myself from a completely drunken state once. It was just luck.

“It’s just an excuse to get off with loads of people.”

And when we kiss…

Sometimes I look back to university life in the same way some people look back to the 60s. There was an air of free love and excitement and carefree ways.

But this cliche really does depend on the person.

In previous posts, I’ve already explained that I continued a long-distance relationship throughout my entire time at uni. That doesn’t mean I don’t have hundreds of stories to tell. I mean, it was impossible to get away from sex, romance, naked bodies, flirting, and everything else related to sexual relations. It was university, after all.

So I suppose, in general, some people did use their time as an excuse to get off with loads of people. And some of the most unlikely and prudish of people lost their virginity under strange circumstances at uni. I’m sure my place of study wasn’t the only one in the UK to have that kind of thing going on. In fact, I know it wasn’t, because peeps I knew from other unis had similar stories of orgies and romps and ‘things that go bump-bump-bump-bump-bump in the night’…

“They sit around all day, not doing any work, and watching daytime TV.”

remote power 3

This is just a rubbish slur from people who don’t understand. If you’re a student and you don’t have a study period at some point in the day, there’s every possibility you’ll be sat down in your room, in the kitchen, in a friend’s room, at the refectory, or a million other possible places where there happens to be a TV on. That doesn’t mean all you’re doing is sitting around not doing any work and it doesn’t mean you’re properly watching the TV. The majority of adults work during the day, so of course they aren’t going to experience the soul-destroying confrontations with daytime television. They should count themselves lucky, rather than talk like they’re jealous.

Anyway, Neighbours teaches us about other cultures and Countdown helps boost our English and Maths skills… Erm, you do believe me, don’t you?

“Students are messy, lazy, untidy, unclean, loud and ignorant.”

Shout!

This is another misconception. Some are, some are not. And why are very different negative words invariably used together to create a picture of horror? If you’re a bit loud, it might not make you lazy. If you’re untidy, you aren’t necessary unclean. Bad personal hygiene doesn’t automatically suggest that your room isn’t neat.

And university is a continuation of your academic life. So how can that make us so wrong?

Luckily, this kind of cliche is making less of a nuisance of itself. Thank goodness for that.

“At night, they cause trouble through their drunken states and end up stealing traffic cones, roadworks signs, and estate agent boards.”

Striking Cone

The majority of students DO NOT do this. A small number of students are always going to find this the funniest thing to do. Be happy that it’s nothing worse.

The reason why it seems like so many people take these signs is because those few people who DO take them, don’t mind doing it regularly and in batches. When I spoke to a campus warden about the situation, he said he caught one person red handed as he walked back on campus with 3 estate agent ‘for sale’ boards. The warden stopped the student and asked what he thought he was doing.

The student replied, “This is the first time I’ve done something like this. I’m drunk. Sorry.”

Why he had been doing this on his own, I don’t know.

Anyway, they walked to the student’s room and the warden told him to go in and stop being an idiot. The student apologised again and opened the door to his room. Being drunk, he hadn’t thought about what was inside his room. The warden glanced inside and saw a room covered with traffic signs, estate agent boards, cones, flashing warning lights, warning signs, part of a shop front, and an actual set of traffic lights.

Maybe he’s the only person doing this in the UK, but he’s giving students a bad name…?

“Students are all poor and scrounge off the state system.”

Pound Coins

Okay, well this is dramatically changing. Fees and loans are ripping through half this cliche in a big way. Now the truth is nearer to ‘students are all poor’ and leaving it at that. If you’ve got all the monetary support you could need, then you’re a very lucky individual and you’ll wonder why you have so many friends that you don’t recognise…especially when you’re down the pub. Your round…

It’s hotting up…

Freshers are now pouring into unis all over the country and, for many, this will be a totally new experience.  It will also be the first time most have been away from home, with total independence and freedom to do as they please.

If you’re one of those Freshers…Hello and good luck to you.

During this busy time of a new academic year, is there anything about uni life that you would like to know more about?  Are there any aspects of Higher Education that you would like to see featured here?

Writing Essays – Don’t Fool Yourself

Studying Late

I’ve seen it so many times.

I’d ask my mates if they wanted to go out and do something. One would say, “I’ve got an essay due in tomorrow by 10 o’clock.”

“How much have you done so far?” I’d ask.

“Well, I’ve got some of the quotes I want to use, and I’ve photocopied half a chapter from one of the books in the library on the subject, so all I need to do is write the essay tonight.”

“So you’re going to sit down and write an essay from scratch in the 15 or so hours you’ve got before it needs to be handed in? Are you even going to get any sleep?”

“I doubt it! I’ve got an essay to do, remember!?”

I shouldn’t have always been so surprised. This type of conversation happened regularly. With lots of different people. Rather than work steadily through an essay over the time period set, they were using a dangerous ‘last minute’ method so the ‘punishment’ lasted as little time as possible.

I don’t know why this method of working won’t go away, because:

  • It’s not useful
  • Your grades will suffer as a result
  • A high dose of stress is never a good thing
  • It gets in the way of reality. Everything stops for this essay.

Don’t kid yourself that this is a good way to work. In fact, don’t kid yourself that it takes away the stress in the long run.

Say you have an essay to complete that requires approximately 1500 words. Let’s add that you have about a month before it’s due in. That’s 30 days to play with.

Here’s what you can do with that time:

  • Make a few very brief notes on what you think your answer would be. Total time shouldn’t be more than about 20 minutes. It’s just to get your mind working.
  • Get down the library just before or after a lecture (so it’s just another part of your day, rather than a forced need to be somewhere). See what books are there, take out any relevant books and photocopy any snippets you think will be helpful. Total time will depend, but you’d be doing this at some point anyway, so you might as well get it out of the way quick, while it’s fresh in your head (and before everybody else has taken the books out that you wanted…)
  • After digesting your research, see if it’s changed your viewpoint to answering the essay questions? If so, spend another 20 minutes or so roughly sketching how you would now see the finished essay.

Hopefully these elements can be done in the first few days of being given your assignment. It should already put you in a commanding position. Next:

  • Try to write an introduction and a conclusion. It doesn’t need to be perfect, because you can make any changes later down the line. Total time = 1-2 hours (possibly quicker if you already have a strong arguement/opinion in your head already).
  • Now you’ve got a clear path, take the research notes you’ve made and look for quotes, passages, names and references that can help strengthen or prove what you’re trying to argue. Total time depends on how much background research you’ve got, but it won’t be too long and you can even do it in quick bursts of 10-15 minutes when you’ve got a few free moments.
  • If necessary, go back to the library and find more good quotes and references. This is optional and you may feel you already have enough to go on.

With all this sorted, you can now work bit by bit on the last thing:

  • WRITING!

Some people work well with a word limit. Whether you set 150 words a day, or 500 words, just try a few short jabs and you should quickly be on the way to a full work.

Other people work better on time limits. Rather than spend a stressful 10-20 hours writing an essay just before it’s due in, it’s good to give yourself lots of sessions, somewhere around 30-60 minutes each time. Once you get over the worry that you’ll be obsessing over your essay all the time – exactly what you’re aiming not to do – you should realise after a few sessions that the work is naturally progressing. With your initial concern over, it shouldn’t be a problem for your future essays.

At some point, with your arguments written up and about the right word count, you’ll need to focus on making what you’ve written as good as possible.

But just think, you wouldn’t have had that chance if you only used one shot at writing the essay in a tired and hurried state.

So instead of using a huge and inappropriate 15 hour writing binge at the last minute, split it into little chunks over the whole time you’ve got.

And if your style works best when doing it all in one go, PLEASE don’t do it at the last minute. Try to make your binge much further away from the deadline. That way, you can still spend an extra hour or two ironing out the creases.

It’ll be worth it for your grades AND for your sanity!

Literature

Long-Distance Relationship: is it for you? – Part 2: Story Time

anger

After my first post on having a Long Distance Relationship (LDR), now I’ll tell you some stories about them, just to show how different the situations can be. I also have the EduLinks set up with loads of information and advice. Some of the advice may be conflicting, but lots of it falls on common ground. There’s no strict answer, but with a bit of reading up, digging deep, and working hard, you’ll at least be closer to getting the best out of your situation.

Now for a few stories. In no particular order:

1. Once upon a time, there was a couple. Let’s call them Active-Girl and Quiet-Man. They went to college together and started going out with each other a few months before finishing their exams. After college finished, they spent most of the summer together having fun and then headed off to different universities.

Active-Girl went wild at uni and made the most of every moment she could. When she wasn’t partying and socialising, she was studying. Meanwhile, Quiet-Man spent a lot of time in his room, missing Active-Girl’s company. He was going out with friends, but not with the same enthusiasm as Active-Girl.

Lucky for this couple, there was an easy train from door to door, so they could meet up (after the long train journey) every 2 or 3 weeks. Very quickly after a couple of visits, it became clear that Active-Girl wanted to take Quiet-Man out to see all her new friends and get involved in all sorts, while Quiet-Man just wanted to catch up quietly with his girlfriend and make the most of the short time they had together.

This couple wanted to stay in the relationship and to be faithful, but their needs had suddenly changed now that they were apart most of the time. So while they had good intentions toward each other, things were looking less promising.

The occassional visits were a marker for this couple and they hardly spoke with each other in between times. Fortunately, they realised this just in time and made a vow to e-mail and ring each other on a regular basis. In that simple vow, the relationship made sense again and they both lived happily ever after. All together now, “Ahhhh!”

———-

2. Another couple, Pocket-Boy and Clingy-Girl, were childhood sweethearts. They got together at a very early age and had a relationship that stretched far beyond romance. They were firmly best friends too. By the time university beckoned, they had been a couple for around 5 years already!

Then something very strange happened.

Before Pocket-Boy and Clingy-Girl went to uni, they mutually agreed to end their long-term love. There was no fuss or bother. They simply shrugged their shoulders and got on with being very good friends indeed.

And you know what? They did remain close friends and they had romances at uni too. And when Pocket-Boy and Clingy-Girl wanted to meet up again, Pocket-Boy would bring a girlfriend and Clingy-Girl would bring a boyfriend.

In agreeing together to call it a day, Pocket-Boy and Clingy-Girl found happiness in their university life and in their own friendship.

———-

3. Lady of Romance wanted to stay in her relationship with Mr. Ambivalent, even though they were going to be at opposite ends of the country to each other. Mr. Ambivalent agreed that staying in the relationship would be a good thing, despite the distance.

But when they went to uni, Mr. Ambivalent saw lots of gorgeous lady students who made his mind whizz about with naughty thoughts. And in all those nights down the Union and in clubs, drinking away happily, it seemed so easy to find these gorgeous lady students who were interested in him.

So he started taking one or two lady students back to his halls. Sometimes, they might be in the same halls too, which made things even easier.

All the while, Lady of Romance was having a good time herself, but minus all the interest in the opposite sex.

You’ll never guess what Lady of Romance decided to do one day…yes, she decided to pay Mr. Ambivalent a surprise visit! I think you know what’s coming next…you fill in the details.

After the obvious kerfuffle, and one slap in the face later, the relationship was no more. Lady of Romance was both happy and sad at the same time to have made a surprise visit to her EX-boyfriend. Luckily, her head was strong and she made a quick recovery. Oh yes, and she suddently started noticing lots of gorgeous gentleman students who made her mind whizz around with naughty thoughts!

———-

4. Fun-Guy and Great-Gal were in a steady relationship. Great-Gal was already a uni student and Fun-Guy was a local to the area. They hooked up, things were great, yada yada…

Then Fun-Guy announces that he’s off to uni too. But it’s a uni in another part of the country. Possible issues, thinks Great-Gal. And they don’t even get the summer together, because Great-Gal travels back home to her parents.

So the farewells are said a few months before uni takes place anyway. However, during that summer period, Great-Gal makes a point of keeping in contact with Fun-Guy. And Fun-Guy happily makes a point of keeping in contact too.

As Fun-Guy and Great-Gal keep in touch, they realise this might just work out.

And it’s true. It did work out. Regular contact made things work wonders. Even on occassions when there was nothing to say, they’d talk rubbish and be happy for the link. Bless!

———-

These situations were all different and none of them resulted in the end of the world, even if the relationship did come to an end. That’s the main point I wanted to make:

Whatever happens, remain strong and focused on a positive future.

It might feel difficult and you may think it’s easier said than done, but keep going and make the most of everything that you do. Dwelling in the past won’t help the situation, but embracing the future will benefit you greatly.

There are loads of different LDRs that I’ve been aware of over the years. Every one has a different story, as you’ve seen above by the examples. If you want advice on these complicated relationships, do check out the EduLinks Long Distance Relationships Special if you haven’t already. There’s plenty of reading material to help you work things out.

Good luck!

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