10 Things To Know When You Start University – A Fresher Tip Sheet


Ah, the joys of starting university! Always room for surprise, even when you think you’ve got it all sussed out beforehand.

I can’t list everything that’ll happen. Nobody can do that.

But here’s a start.

Now you’re a fresher, here’s a list of 10 things to expect. Time to get relationships (with others and with yourself) in check.

In no particular order:

1. First friends aren’t always your best friends.

The pressure to impress is huge. When you find new people, you may form a lasting friendship.

But don’t be too cut up if it doesn’t work out. New people come into your life all the time at university and you’ll get to know all sorts of characters. Some will turn out to be friends for many years to come. Just not necessarily the people you meet in Fresher’s Week.


2. Everyone is coping except you? Don’t believe it!

No matter how out of place and clueless you feel, there are other students just as overwhelmed as you.

It’s easy to think you’re the only person with issues, because you only know your own mind. Starting out at university is not a walk in the park and there’s so much to get to grips with. But remember the first point…people want to look impressive. Not everyone is being totally honest about their difficulties.

If you think you’re the only person who’s not coping well, you’ll feel even worse about it. All those teething troubles are standard.

3. Homesick is standard.

You don’t think you’ll get over it, but you’re likely to have shaken off the sadness within a few weeks. For some, it takes until after Christmas to settle down. It is rare for the problem to be so bad that you have to leave.

For tips on combating those blues, check out my Help for the Hopelessly Homesick.

4. Give new activities a go, so long as you don’t go against your personal opinions/likes/beliefs.

If you don’t drink alcohol, a Fresher pub crawl won’t be your activity of choice. But what if you want to get involved and be a part of the fun with your new housemates?

No problem with joining in. Just don’t feel the need to defend yourself. Peer pressure goes away quicker when you don’t get involved in other people’s fake debates. And the start of a pub crawl (or halfway through it) is a bad time anyway. Bat conversation away and say you’ll explain another day. If someone is too persistent, it may be best to cut your losses and safely remove yourself from their presence.

Stay confident in your identity. As you settle in over the coming weeks, you’ll find situations to suit your lifestyle. The people you get to know here will at least accept who you are, and may even share your core values.

Oh, and if you just want to limit the booze, here are some tips to tame the spirits.


5. You are yourself.

You can’t work out how to make other people like you, because there’s no way for you to befriend yourself. Besides, you don’t need to fake it at university. There are an almost limitless number of choices, options, opinions, likes and dislikes to explore. As with the point above, find the people who will accept and love you for who you are.

6. Everyone pulled except you? Exaggeration only upsets you more.

Everyone did it except me…

So and so ALWAYS happens…

You don’t need to follow the crowd or succomb to peer pressure, as hard as it feels to go against the grain. And I can assure you that not EVERYONE pulls during fresher’s, even though it can seem a bit in your face at times.

7. What do you want to be known for? Be careful.

Do you want to make a big impact on campus from Day One? Getting exposure is great, but you don’t need to do it straight away. Playing the long game is safer than trying to be a hero before you’ve worked out the lay of the land.

Known to be known, no matter what…Is that enough?

8. “If I think the worst, then things can’t get any worse. They’ll only get better.” NOT TRUE!

With this attitude, you’ll only ever think the worst. No matter how good it gets, you’re fixed on the worst outcome, which blinds you to what’s happening.

Prepare for the worst, but don’t think it. Preparation is different to expectation.


9. You’ll work out most things sooner than you think.

The impossible struggle only feels impossible while you’re struggling. Beyond that, it gets better.

It practically always gets better. In all my dealings with freshers over the years, most start with issues that feel insurmountable and nearly every one recovers without fuss. Of the few who find it more difficult, most of them still manage to get over that hurdle.

And if you think your case is different, just remember Point 2. You’re much closer to the side of hope and recovery and success than you think.

10. SU activities are great, but don’t dismiss them if one doesn’t work out.

I made this mistake. I signed up for clubs at the Freshers Fayre, went to my first meeting for one of the clubs, found it disappointing, and decided clubs and societies weren’t much good.

I hardly bothered for a while after that. Yeah…well done me. Sigh.

I’m one of the first people to tell you to look beyond first impressions. Dig deeper, even if your opinion stays the same.

I didn’t follow my own advice here and suffered a little for it. Don’t be quick to dismiss!


There’s a lot to think about settling in as a fresher.

And as soon as you’ve calmed down with these lifestyle issues, then comes all the studying!

If you’re worried about the academic work for the year ahead, I’ve got a great freebie for you…

Get the upper hand and learn to appreciate what’s expected of you and how to prepare for it. Download my ebook ‘Live Life, Study Hard‘ right now.

Becoming A Masterful Graduate: Class, Strategy and Playing ‘The Game’

Becoming A Masterful Graduate: Class, Strategy and Playing 'The Game'

“They have nobody to blame but themselves.”
“If they don’t put in the work, they don’t deserve to get anywhere.”

Comments like these assume that people have a great strategy worked out and simply choose not to bother using it.

These comments also assume that mistakes were made on a level playing field. The only possible reason for underachievement must be laziness and lack of trying. Fault is made to look totally one-sided.

It’s true that you should take responsibility for your actions. But life doesn’t operate on a constant, level playing field. Comparisons are rarely helpful.

Taking personal responsibility isn’t the one difference between success and lack of it. Matters out of your current field of vision and understanding can limit your mindset, even when you are (unknowingly) capable.


When something is out of your current field of vision, it’s time to get strategic.

At school, I jumped through hoops without understanding why. It was only when I realised I could be acting more fruitfully, MUCH more fruitfully, that I crafted a different path. I had made my initial UCAS application for all the wrong reasons and had focused in areas that would not have suited me.

In fact, at that time, university of any kind wouldn’t have suited me. I needed to make a leap. And it took a whole new set of experiences to show me the way.

I’m so thankful that so much changed in the incredible year between leaving Sixth Form and going to university. That in-between year still involved a lot of Sixth Form and university. But I managed, luckily, to change the game.

‘The game’ is all about strategy. Ciaran Burke’s new book, Culture, Capitals and Graduate Futures: Degrees of Class, explores the problematic relationships between social class and graduate achievement.

Through a series of graduate interviews, Burke found that future career strategies are heavily impacted by early social and class experiences. He explains that individuals tend to feel in control of their destiny, yet appear to follow certain patterns depending on their class grouping.

Burke states:

“A common theme within much social policy, pertaining to social mobility, is individual responsibility…Social mobility policy needs to approach the issue more holistically, considering inequalities between groups rather than seeing it as a working-class problem; as Payne (2012) comments, low social mobility should not be understood solely as the working class failing to enter the middle class but the middle class, effectively, keeping them out.”

These issues, Burke argues, are not properly addressed in policy, which has led to “contradictions and limitations within policy narratives“. His work describes the need for widening participation and social mobility to be discussed with a more sociological approach. He suggests that some documents, such as Alan Milburn’s Unleashing Aspiration, come close, but “do not make the leap”.

Jo Johnson’s recent speech as minister for universities and science included the commitment to double the entry rate of those from disadvantaged backgrounds by 2020, compared to 2009 levels. However, greater access to university is just the start. Johnson also explained that UCAS will publish data and analysis regarding protected and disadvantaged groups. While this information will be useful in assessing applications, Burke’s findings appear to suggest that widening participation does not turn into social mobility and a guarantee of increased success off the back of securing a degree. Other strategies that must be uncovered to help these students, once they graduate, to understand not only what is within their grasp, but also how to firmly grasp it.

In a Times Higher Education review of Burke’s book, Huw Morris concludes:

What Burke’s book reveals to this reviewer is, first, the need to help young people and their families gain a better understanding of “the game” of graduate social mobility, and, second, the part that employers could play in rewriting the rules of a process that is becoming more costly and less like a game.

Better understanding of ‘the game’ is needed in order to improve the “field of the possibles” because Burke states that there is a “cap limiting what the working-class respondents understand themselves to be capable of achieving“.

Blinkered to the 'field of the possibles' can limit capability.

Being blinkered to the ‘field of the possibles’ can limit capability.

To overcome artificial limits, therefore, greater emphasis is needed on improving strategy.

For instance, Burke states that working-class students believe that an institution’s reputation “will increase their chances of securing graduate employment“. But middle-class students are playing the game differently: “The middle-class graduates understand the situation and read for their degree based on the merits of the individual course; they appreciate it is that course that will increase their ability to find a graduate job, not the presumed institutional capital.

I believe strategy goes far beyond the merits of a course too. University isn’t about a course, it’s not about grades, it’s not about social life, it’s not about engaging in seminars, it’s not about joining societies, it’s not about making friends, it’s not about writing essays, and it’s not about learning to be independent.

University is about all these things.

And so much more than that.

I see three big-picture terms within the strategy:

  1. Mastery – Move beyond learning the minimum. Basic expectations are there to be surpassed, not followed on the dot.
  2. Narrative – Explaining what you’ve done, what you’re doing, and where you’re going. Describing how you’ve mastered pertinent skills and why it matters. Signalling your achievements so they make sense to those who need to know.
  3. Self-imposed limits – Not self-imposed beliefs, but a conscious decision to focus on a small number of concentrated areas. It’s a cycle, because these self-imposed limits help you to achieve mastery and to form a narrative that’s exciting and makes sense.

As you develop your strategy, it becomes easier to take action. And once you take action, bit by bit, you discover more. You learn new things that you thought would remain a mystery your entire life. Discoveries that go way beyond your degree.

It could be how to play the instrument that you always wanted to enjoy. Or how to organise your life without breaking into a sweat…How to network like a champion…How to start a movement…How to work with others.

Social mobility goes beyond getting a degree. Access to university is one piece of a much bigger puzzle.

Even if access to higher education never was an issue, it doesn’t help to simply feel entitled, as Burke explains in his book. To be the student you deserve to be, assumptions–both humble and grand–only serve to get in the way. As with coursework, there are no marks for assuming without putting in the research and experimentation.

The playing field isn’t level. That’s why strategy is so important. When I realised this, it changed my perception. Not only did more seem possible, but the work involved also felt less of an uphill struggle.

You’ve probably heard people say that because they were able to achieve a certain goal, it follows that anyone could achieve it. “If *I* can do it, anyone can!”

While there may be some truth in that, it’s too simplistic to see that as sufficient proof and motivation to guarantee success. More work must be done on developing strategic mindsets. More people need to be aware that they’re playing the game. When that’s apparent, people will also have a more conscious choice over how they wish to play it.


The One Where I Review A Mobile Phone

I live in a small pocket of space where mobile coverage doesn’t happen. Step outside and you’ve got excellent reception. So unless I’m happy to leave my home EVERY time I need to make a call, I need to rely on wifi and use apps like Skype and Whatsapp.

windows phoneStill, the peeps at Three asked if I’d like to take a Nokia Lumia 530 for a whirl to demonstrate one of their rolling monthly contracts. A rolling contract is a an option that fits between pay-as-you-go and a lengthy contract. It means you pay monthly, but you’re not tied in. The payments continue only for as long as you choose stick with it.

Full disclosure, I’m told I can keep the phone. And while I don’t plan on changing my current phone any time soon, I’ve enjoyed testing a Windows phone for the first time and trying out my first Nokia in a long time.

I used to get nothing but Nokia for years. Every upgrade…make it a Nokia.

And then I went all Blackberry on the place. Don’t laugh. What can I say, I still love the keyboard thing!

So that’s where I’ll start on the Nokia phone…Virtual keyboard. I’ve used on-screen keyboards on tablets, but not on smaller screens before. Thankfully, the Lumia one is pretty good, and the predictions on screen mean I tap even less to get the words out. In other words, writing messages and texting is pretty easy.

Here are some more of my thoughts, in no particular order:

Photo taken while on my travels with the Nokia Lumia 530

  • Camera is impressive. Better than my current phone, even though they have the same megapixels. Low light photos are a bit noisy/grainy, but the phone lets you take pictures nice and quickly, which is great for capturing memories on the fly. If you want an award-winning photo, you’re better off not using a phone anyway. The photos in this post were all taken while using the phone indoors at Warwick Castle, in different levels of light.
  • Phone is responsive. I like the smooth operation and generally how quickly stuff runs. It’s not got the fastest processor, but it runs great so long as you don’t have lots of apps open at once.
  • Battery life is poor. Even with hardly any use, the battery needs recharging a lot. Be prepared.
  • The Cortana voice assistant is fun and effective. Responses to some questions and commands take longer than others, but Cortana genuinely made some tasks easier to deal with via voice than tapping it all out myself. My favourite is “Wake me up in 20 minutes” when I want a powernap. My son’s favourite is asking Cortana how she is (generally very well) and whether she speaks any French (“When in France, oui.”).
  • Not much memory. Unless you plan to simply make calls and send texts, it’s worth getting a memory card in the phone. The phone has an already low 4GB, but around half of that was already used when I started the phone for the first time. Once you download a few basic apps, you’ll run out of space. And if you start taking lots of photos or download music and video too, there’s no chance.
  • Data and wifi features are good. It’s easy to set up warnings when you’re getting close to your mobile tariff’s data limit. I had no problem with wifi connection and speed either.
  • The Windows 8.1 experience. Windows is pretty easy to use and get to grips with on the phone. But I did have a couple of mystery moments that I had to search for help with.
    Like when I didn’t know how to fully close an app or go between apps. Turns out you have to hold down the back button for your open apps to appear in a row, ready to be selected or closed.
  • Call quality is fine. Yes, people still make calls. Even I do. At least, whenever I’m not actually at home…sigh.
    It’s like saying nobody uses email any more. It’s not that simple. So you still need to have a mobile that sounds okay when you’re on a call. I had no complaints on calls and could hear everything just fine.

Photo taken with Nokia Lumia 530

Another photo I took with the Nokia phone


The Nokia Lumia 530 has lots of functionality for a casual user. If you’re not worried about having an all-singing, all-dancing smartphone with access to every app and the fastest processor, this will do more than enough. And, of course, you get the calls and texts from the rolling contract…If you’re already happy with the phone you’ve got, it can be a good option and you don’t have to panic about another year or two of compulsory payments. If you need to downgrade to a cheaper tariff, or switch to pay-as-you-go, there’s nothing stopping you.

This won’t replace my work phone, but it’s fun. When I’m out and about on social visits, I’d prefer to have this phone to hand, if only so I can take better photos. The software is easy to use, full of features, and takes pictures quickly in high and low light.

But now, if you don’t mind, I’m heading outside so I can actually make a call…!

A waxwork that looks strangely like David Willetts... Photo taken with Nokia Lumia 530.

A waxwork at Warwick Castle that looks strangely like David Willetts…


7 Crucial Considerations To Help You Stay In Touch With Uni Friends After You Graduate

I sometimes wonder if I’m the absolute worst at keeping in touch with friends.

Okay, I have some close mates who like to compete for the title. So maybe lots of us are like that.

How well do you keep the sparks flying? Are you fiendishly friend-focused, or do you have serious trouble touching base?

If it’s bad for you now, think how tough you’ll find it when you graduate!

So this post is for you (and me) to reflect on how we can do better at having meaningful relationships, even from a distance and when your lives go in every direction.

Here are seven thoughts on staying BFFs with heart and passion:

1. Understand that not everyone is brilliant at keeping in touch.

You may already be amazing at relationships. Some people keep the flame burning with ease. Others treat the flame like an oxygen-free room would…It goes out instantly and it’s practically impossible to reignite the fire.

If you NEVER hear from a friend and they aren’t excited when you get in touch, maybe it’s time to cut your losses. Otherwise, try not to sweat it. Be happy that you can reach out better than most people.

2. Embrace the inevitable change that comes your way.

Whether you’re leaving the comfort of campus in your second year, or you’re moving back home at the end of your degree, one thing is always the same…Change!

A common response is to lament how people move on, but why not enjoy experiencing all the developments that your friends go through, just the same as you’re developing yourself?

That mindset alone helps you let go of unimportant things and keep hold of what really matters. You awesome friend, you.

3. Get in touch meaningfully.

Go beyond social media. Send a letter or a postcard once in a while. You don’t have to be on holiday or doing anything special either.

Buy some fun postcards and stamps, keep them close to hand, and write a few brief words of love every now and then. Make it a habit. I wish I’d done this. I got as far as collecting some postcards, but didn’t get much further. Don’t make my mistake!

4. It’s all about the little things in life.

Telling your friends what you’re up to gets you thinking about the big news you want to share. But if you want to stay in touch more frequently, nothing beats a bit of boring detail.

Your day-to-day life is what makes you tick. The big experiences are profound and worth talking about, but not at the expense of the other weeks in the year when you’re not doing something massive.

Share your small stories and let your mates know what it’s like to be you in the calmer, everyday moments.

5. Don’t begrudge them new mates.

When you’ve lived in someone else’s pockets for a year or three, you can get pretty possessive. And it’s fair to be a bit jealous when you know someone else is hanging around such a good mate on a regular basis.

But would you rather your good friend had no other friends? Would you prefer that they stayed in every night and had no social life?

It would be strange if your friend had left university and NOT made some new mates. There’s no need to feel like it’s a competition or that your friendship has been overtaken by someone else.

All friendships are unique, so drop the comparisons and love your matchless bond.

6. Find new ways to get together.

I’ve found that the best way to keep long-distance friendships sparkly is to vary the activities.

Go to events, go on holiday, go to their place, invite them to yours, meet up halfway and explore a brand new place…

7. …Or have a regular meetup.

Routine reunions are another way to ensure you have something to be excited about from one visit to another.

The reason why I prefer to mix things up is because it’s difficult when circumstances change and the regular thing becomes too difficult. Jobs can make it difficult. So can kids, moving further away, and other commitments.

But a change in situation doesn’t mean a change in friendship. You just need to be willing to work with new conditions.

If that means a new routine can be found, great! Otherwise, don’t be afraid to focus more on special events to keep the spark alive.

How good are you at keeping in touch? I like visits and events, but I’m not so good with the everyday communication. There are people I haven’t seen in years who I think about almost daily. If only they knew that I was thinking about them.

My job is to get back in contact and let those people know. That’s next on my list.

What’s next on yours?